My last breath
by Candylovin Fehrian
Summary: What happened after Graduation? Who is left standing? This story will give some answers about the last breaths of our Roswellians...
1. Last breaths

**A/N I was in a sad mood, and this is the result... But hey, maybe there will be a happy ending... The title refers to the song by Evanescence: "My last breath"**

_Hold on to me love  
You know I can't stay long  
All I wanted to say was  
I love you and I'm not afraid_

The blood was flowing freely down his hands, it stained his shirt and was even smeared across his face. But he didn't notice, the only thing he was focusing his attention on was the woman lying in his arms. Her form limp, as if she was being held together with one breath. One last breath. A sob hitched inside his throat, trying to break free. But he stopped it before it could leave his mouth. Tiny shivers still went through her body, giving him the knowledge that she was still alive, that she was still with him, that she still had a chance. Her broken voice broke his concentration, keeping him from forming a connection.

"Michael," she whispered, strength leaving her voice every passing second.

He shook his head vehemently, his hair flinging around, the strands stinging in his eyes. He ran one blood-soaked hand through it, leaving clumps of blood in it.

"Shhh, it's okay, don't talk. We're gonna find Max, he- he'll fix it. He'll fix it baby…"

Now it was Maria's turn to shake her head, and with the little strength she had she produced a little movement.

"I- I can feel it. It's okay." Ever so slowly she willed her hand to reach his face, and with the softest touch she turned his face, forcing him to look her in the eyes. His brown orbs, now filled with tears that refused to fall, met her loving green ones. But they were different now, as if the light was leaving them, only leaving behind shells of what once could be seen in them.

"I love you, Michael. I loved you from the moment in that cheap motel room…" coughs wracked her tiny body, and blood seeped past her opened lips, leaving them luscious red.

Michael only held tighter, his hand still on the gaping wound in her stomach. But it was no use, the blood was still seeping through in rapid pace.

"I'm- I'm not afraid, not any more…"

_Can you hear me?  
Can you feel me in your arms  
Holding my last breath?  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you_

The past few years had been the hardest years of their lives. After their flee from Roswell, all had expected to have the life they had always dreamed of.

Freedom.

But they had gotten the opposite. Their travels in the cramped van were short, cause the FBI seemed to know their every move. So their freedom wasn't freedom. They were trapped, on the run, but always trapped. The first one to fall was Liz. Texas was the state that meant the end of her. She had seen it herself, but decided against telling Max. So when they came for her, in the cheap motel room they had been staying at, she was ready for them. With her newly developed powers she knocked two of them out, before they got to her. They never wasted time on examining her, they went for the kill.

Isabel had sensed it, running in the small room, only to find her sister in law's body, blood pooling around her, and her dull brown eyes looking empty. Max was one second behind her, and his screams could be heard in the entire area, causing the rest of the small group to appear from various places. Only to see the boy, who once was a king, sitting on the floor next to the cold body of his wife.

When Maria saw her once best friend, she sagged onto the floor, opening her mouth in a soundless cry. Michael crouched next to her, giving silent support by putting his arms around her and pulling her into his chest where she cried.

She cried, and couldn't stop crying, not when Max blew up the remaining agents, not when they ran again and not when she was sleeping. She cried for days, and she cried in Michaels arms.

After Liz' death the group went silent. The whole 'running away towards great adventures- idea' wasn't there anymore. This was real, and it was dark.

The second one that breathed her last breath was Isabel. She was miserable after what happened to Liz, and it made her miss Jesse even more. It made her miss him so much, that she took a risk, a risk that cost her her life.

She came to Kyle at night, telling him of her plan, and he disagreed. But it was her choice, so he decided to come with her. They went silently in the night. Only leaving a note, that said not to wait for them.

Kyle returned alone.

He returned, clothes torn and crumpled, stains on his face. He told them what happened when they found Jesse, how he was already gone. Examined, put through tests no one would want to be put through. After they got what they wanted, they had gotten rid of him. And when Isabel had found his body, she had gone in to a wild rage. With eyes blazing, she blew up the research facility with all its records and all its employees, including herself. And Kyle had been there, holding her in his arms when she took her last breath.

Max didn't speak, he hadn't spoken a word since Liz' downfall. He just let the tears escape his eyes.

Michael and Maria did what they always did the past few months, they sought comfort with each other. And at night, they cried, for the lives of their friends, the lives of their family and for their own lives, for they felt like they were already dead.

Kyle had changed, not only in the alien way, but also in the human way. He grew silent, jokes no longer part of his vocabulary. Only one word- sentences left his mouth every once in a while. But most of all, he grew careless. And the carelessness was what did him in. He went shopping, and when he would have checked the street, he would have found it empty. When he would have been paying attention, he would have noticed the lack of customers in the store. And when he finally noticed them, with their dark suits, pointing their guns on him, it was already too late…

_Sweet rapture and life,  
It ends here tonight_

They only heard the shots, but it was enough. Michael and Max wordlessly ran for it, seeing the body being carried from the store and put into the waiting car. They knew it was too late. So they did what they were used to, they ran. Leaving the van, they took Maria and stole the first car they saw.

And now, they were here, in the coldness of the sand, in the darkness of the Californian desert…The only ones who were left, the ones that lasted the longest, now had to say goodbye to another of their own. And not just anybody, she was the person who had kept all of them together, the person with enough love to partly heal the wounds which resided in their shattered hearts.

Michaels thoughts inadvertently shifted to a happier time, a time without loss, a time filled with love, happiness and banter.


	2. Magical memories

_**A/N Second chapter, a little romance for all of you this winter. And remember, this is a memory... Hope you like it! Enjoy...**_

Michaels thoughts inadvertently shifted to a happier time, a time without loss, a time filled with love, happiness and banter.

_I'll miss the winter  
A world of fragile things  
Look for me in the white forest  
Hiding in a hollow tree_

The winter in Minnesota was cold and white. Compared to Roswell winters, it was magical. Several inches of snow were piled up in the white forest, making it look like a world drawn from a fairytale. The whole group was cooped up in a small cabin, but somehow, the tension seemed to seep away in the magic of that first winter. Each couple had their own bedroom and stayed their almost the entire time, bonding.

Lying in their small bedroom, their naked bodies covered with layers of sheets, they bantered. Cause that was what they did, they fought like cats and dogs and they made up. After that, they bantered.

"No way mister, you can't just say that and not keep up to your promise!"

"Maria, if you want to do it, just do it. I sure as hell won't be the one to do it." Michael replied, faked annoyance in his voice.

"But…" Maria sputtered.

"No, and by the way, I never promised you I would do it. I just said you would have to be crazy to think of something like that."

"But it's so beautiful now. The whole world covered in freshly fallen snow. It all seems so fragile. Doesn't it make you think about the things of life?"

Michael snorted, "Yeah, it makes me think that I'm nice and warm in this bed, with you, covered in blankets."

He nuzzled a little deeper between the covers, draping his body halfway across hers, making her giggle in surprise.

Swatting his arm, she stopped his antics and started kissing the arm which was draped over her shoulder. If she couldn't convince him with words…

The deep groan coming from the body besides her, made her smile a satisfied grin. She stopped kissing, and turned her head towards his. Looking deeply into his lust filled eyes she said, with a sultry voice, "Please?"

And when he ignored her and started his own kissing path along her cheekbone, she added a little more oil to the fire.

"I'll make it worth your while…" she whispered, turning away from him, leaving an empty void in the warm bed.

And as she stood there, only a blanket covering her slim body, her now long blond hair falling messily down her bare back, Michael couldn't help but think she looked absolutely angelic. In a split second he knew she had him in the palm of her hand. If she would have said jump at that moment, he would have only asked, 'How high?'

And she knew it. A large smile spread itself on her face, brightening up her emerald eyes, making them glow in the early morning light. Michaels face remained stoic, but the lights in his eyes told her he didn't mind. So she decided to use it and do the thing she so desperately wanted to do.

"Come on Spaceboy, we've got ourselves a nice white blanket waiting for us to make angels into it." a small squeal escaped her as she bounced towards the screen door, giving them entry to the beautiful landscape of a Minnesota winter forest.

With a deep sigh, Michael got up from the bed, one blanket wrapped around his naked body. And as he shuffled slowly to the open screen door, already feeling the cold biting into his skin, a soft mutter could be heard underneath his breath, "I'm whipped…"

But as soon as he saw her standing outside, barefoot in the snow, making fresh tracks in it. He knew why he did this. Her lips were already red from the cold and small clouds were coming from her mouth as he walked over to her, ignoring the stinging cold in his feet, and wrapped himself around her.

And there they stood, two star-crossed lovers, on the run for the government, only covered with sheets keeping each other warm in this fairytale winter wonderland. Breathing in the early morning air which left their mouths in tiny clouds, they stood, not thinking, just feeling.

As a single tear made it's way down Maria's cheek, Michael made sure it didn't fall. Giving her the knowledge he'd always be there to keep her from falling…

_I know you hear me,  
I can taste it in your tears.  
Holding my last breath  
Safe inside myself  
Are all my thoughts of you_

After a few minutes Maria suddenly broke away, running of into the nearby patch of trees. Leaving only a trail for Michael to follow. Her joyous laughter could be heard resounding through the trees, making her sound and look like a forest nymph. He saw how her long legs almost floated over the snow, while she firmly kept her sheet in place.

Grumbling a little, just loud enough for her to hear, he started the pursuit. When he almost had her and grabbed a piece of the sheet she was still clinging to, he stumbled and landed face down in the powdery snow. The thump his body made when making contact with the icy cold snow, made Maria stop dead in her tracks.

She carefully approached him, worrying now his body remained still in the cold snow.

"Michael?" she whispered, touching his bare back with one of her ice-cold feet.

"Michael, this isn't funny!" she whined, a little louder now.

"Michael?" she softly whispered again.

Touching his shoulder lightly, her face came closer to his. But the minute she was close enough, a growl escaped his throat and he jumped up, all covered in snow pulling her down with him.

A high pitched scream left her throat the minute he shot up and she staggered backwards, but she was to slow. Together the two of them fell down in the snow, both shivering, but also both feeling very flustered after a few minutes of 'snow wrestling'.

When Michael felt the deep shiver running through the small pixie in his arms, he suddenly got up, Maria still in his arms, sheets twisted around them, and carried her back to the warmth of the cabin.

Inside, near the small but warm fireplace he put her down, and made her remember the promise she made _him. _And she made it worth his while...


	3. It ends here tonight

_**A/N It took me a while to finish this, but I did! I hope you'll like it, even tough it is pretty sad... Sorry for the wait, but... enjoy!**_

_Sweet rapture and life,  
It ends here tonight  
_

His thoughts of that magical time were interrupted by her slight cough. And he realized he had only spaced out for a second. Cause his Pixie, his lover, was still there, she was still breathing. Her emerald eyes, now slightly dulled, were fixed on his face. He felt them burn his soul, like they always had. From the moment he met her, those eyes wouldn't leave him alone.

He couldn't lose those eyes! The thought seemed to spark something inside of him, and his head shot up. Where was Max? Looking over the dark Californian sand, the rocks where THEY were probably still hidden, their rifles pointed at the scene in front of them, just waiting and looking at the sick situation they had created. His head frantically moved from left to right, as his hoarse voice called out one name. At first it was like a whisper, his grief already choking him. But as he didn't get a respond, the yelling became louder.

"Max! Max! Where are you? Max!"

As he didn't get a respond, his voice faded in the hoarse whisper it had started with,

"Max, we need you…"

And all of a sudden he saw it. Next to the abandoned car they had used to get to this spot. The spot where they were trapped, where they had tricked them. They had went for it, like moths drawn to a flame. The prospect of turning back the events that had lead to this, had fulfilled them with hope, so they had taken the risk. But the risk had killed them, all of them… And as he saw the car, with the dark human shape lying in front of it, he knew it. They had won, they were dead now, all of them.

_  
Closing your eyes  
You pray your dreams will leave you here,  
But still you wake and know the truth -  
No one's there_

Grief for the death of his best friend, of his brother, filled him but he pushed it aside. She was still here. She was still with him. The form in his arms was still shaking, but she felt colder now. And he knew… She was holding on. She was holding on for him. She knew he couldn't let her go. So she was still here, holding on, suffering, for him. The amount of pain following that thought was almost the end of him. His heart was being held in an iron grip, and right now, he wouldn't mind if that grip became the death of him.

The sound of her ragged voice called him back from the recesses of his mind.

"M- Michael…"

"Shh, don't talk baby. Max is… Max can't come, but I'll fix it. I promise I'll fix everything."

A small smile found its way to her bloodied lips, and her grip on his arm tightened as a spasm of pain ripped through her entire body.

"Promises, promises…" the loving look in her eyes told him what she truly meant, "You… you already did… fix me."

A single tear pooled from her green eyes, mingling with the blood and dust on her cheeks. Understanding swept through him in that moment. She was letting go, but he understood. They had fixed each other. However broken they had been one time, now they were whole. And he had to let go of the part of him that had fixed everything. He had to let go of the part of her that was inside of him, let go of part of himself. He knew how this would end, but decided to give her what was left of him…

__

Say goodnight, don't be afraid  
Calling me, holding me, as you fade to black  


"Can I go?"

The question had come so sudden and was spoken so softly he almost didn't hear it. The thrumming in his ears didn't make it easier to hear her either.

Shifting her weight in his arms, he noticed the shivers had lessened, and she had become still. Locking her eyes with his, he nodded ever so slowly, showing her how he felt about her with his eyes. Tears pooled in them, he knew that, but he didn't care. Nothing mattered but her. The beauty in his arms, she who had changed the gruff alienboy with the sad past. The boy who couldn't show his feelings, the boy, now a man, crying over the dying form in his arms.

He pulled her tighter as he felt her take in one big breath. It seemed to linger in the air for a few seconds, and he did what he needed to do. He pulled her even closer and placed his lips on hers, getting a slight reaction, but as he felt her hand fall away from his arm, he also felt her lips go slack. The finality of the situation hit him all of a sudden like a ton of bricks.

"No, no… no, no, no, no, no… NO!"

The scream tore through his body, like it tore through the desert night. It vibrated the cool night air as the stars shown brightly over them.

He rocked her body, turning cold already, stroking her hair with his calloused hand as he kept his head buried in the crook of her neck. Tears leaked from his eyes, and he couldn't stop them.

She had started them, years back, and she was the only one who could end them now. But she wouldn't. She was gone. The one person he knew would always be there. And she was gone.

Killed of in the desert. The irony he felt at that thought scared him.

'It started in the desert, so that's where it will end Guerin…'

And with that, he was filled with a sense of determination. Gently he let go of her body, putting her down in the sand. With one hand he closed her empty eyes that were still staring into space. The look on her face was almost angelic and he had to use every single muscle in his body not to let himself lie down next to her, to crumple and die himself. But he had a goal now…

Slowly he stood up, facing the huge rocks where he knew they were hiding, waiting.

A glimmer of a rifle was the only warning he got as his hand shot out at the same time a shot flew past his ear. Although the shot missed him, he didn't miss the agent. A slight explosion of heat could be seen behind the outcrop of the rock on the left. A form landed a few feet further, dead.

It was the signal that started the next few moments. Gunshots flew everywhere by now, as he kept building up power.  
All of a sudden pain pierced his leg. A hot screaming pain which made it hard for him to keep standing up. But he managed. Even though his shoulder felt the same. His hands were glowing, and the sound of screaming men was like heaven to his ears. Unconsciously he hadn't realised he was one of the screaming voices. The raw pain which was eating him alive, emotionally as well as physically, provided him with more power.

And all of a sudden, for one second, there was no sound, just a blinding pain in his gut and one flash of heat as the entire rock formation exploded. Taking all of the men which were hidden in there with it. The thunder came fast, and he sank to his knees.

There it was again! The blessed silence. It followed the thunder, as death was all that was left around him. Bodies filled the landscape around him.

He looked around slowly, seeing the result of his determination, and he sank to his knees.

His breath came in slight gasps and he felt happy. Through the immense pain in his entire body, he could only feel happiness. He would see her again…

Feeling the blood flow from several wounds on his arms, legs and chest, he laid himself down on his back.

Facing the starts above him he could see the small clouds he made by breathing, in… out… in… out…

In… one word came out as he knew this would be _his _last one.

"Maria…"

Only one little cloud of air came from his cracked lips, as his body turned still and none followed.

_  
(say goodnight) holding my last breath  
(don't be afraid) safe inside myself  
(holding me) are my thoughts of you  
Sweet rapture and life,  
It ends here tonight_

And so it ended. With the final alien lying down on the sand, taking his last breath. And as the small cloud disappeared six stars could be seen, shooting through the sky, all at the same time.

Six stars, travelling the skies, blinding the earth with its green colours, making millions of people look up, in wonder. Something ended tonight, they just didn't know…


End file.
